JS: A Merrill man is accused of waterboarding his girlfriend after he suspected she was cheating on him. A criminal complaint charges 22-year-old Dylan VanCamp with six felonies and three misdemeanors, including suffocation and stalking. Prosecutors say VanCamp covered the woman’s mouth with a washcloth and dumped water on her face in order to get her to talk about another man. The alleged incidents happened in June and November 2015. WAOW-TV reports the woman told investigators she had a hard time breathing and felt as if she was drowning. She eventually went to authorities with her abuse allegations.

I don’t know what that haircut’s called that Dylan VanCamp has in that mugshot, but I know that if you’re a girl who willingly dates somebody with the sides of his head completely shaved but still shaggy on top, you’ve gotta know there’s a chance you’ll get waterboarded. I’m not giving the guy an excuse or saying it was ok, I’m just saying she should’ve realized it was a possibility that the guy who straight razors his scalp may not be mature and reasonable when his relationship has a rough patch.

But if you’re a guy who’s been cheated on, why would you even want to waterboard the girl to get all the details? I just don’t see why you’d go through torturing somebody just to get information that you probably don’t really even want to hear in the first place. Best case she ends up telling you all about how she cheated on you, worst case you end up with a mugshot on every news station in the state. That’s a lose-lose.